A view by Varsha Venkataramani
"What are all the complications of a relationship?" they asked. "Relationship itself a
complicated one!" came my answer.
You may wonder why I stated it in such a way.
Have you ever thought why some bond breaks?
They would have been the best and dearest friend once upon a time, but now it would have been
the complete reverse case scenario. No communication, no texts, no talks. Everything would
have been seized.
From sharing each and every thing, be it happiness or sorrow to gossiping about everyone, once
there was a strong sisterhood between those two girls, but now they don't even wish each other on their birthday!
"They were so cute together as a couple! I liked every social media pictures of them. Admired
them for that chemistry! But why did they got separated" our thoughts on seeing most of the divorced couples!
And many, many ,many more relationship goes futile! Be it in case of friends, lovers, couples,
brothers or sisters, or some other important relatives.. And I see in certain places, the bond
between a Parent and a child is itself in a weakened state!
So why this happens? What are all the root cause?
"The major factor is we expect more! We tend to be in a state of mind that wishes to receive the
love from other person, than to give it to them". We often come to a misconception about particular person or an incident without actually knowing the truth! We believe what we feel, rather than taking a step further to know the truth behind!
"Why it is always me who should go behind them, let them come if they truly love me"
"Why can't he/she make a call?"
"Why didn't he/she tell it to me first?"
"Why is he/she hiding something from me?"
tend to run in our mind, when things don't happen as we expected!
The other person would have been in a severe traumatic position, may be they would have
wanted some solitude time to spend, they would have thought if sharing things may put us in a
state of sober, so would have avoided it!
We should train our mind to think it in an optimistic way, rather than troubling ourselves with
Over thinking is one such monster of relationship!
Possessiveness, Ego, Jealousy, Dominance are the real time killer of any relationship!
Silly doubts, anger, childish behavior, taking superior power over the other person, considering
oneself as the best person, taking pride and proud about oneself, not giving the needed priority,
negative remarks, pessimistic thoughts and most importantly MISUNDERSTANDING are the
ingredients to spoil the human relations, however strong they are!
There are two types of people:
1.The one who don't ask sorry what ever the situation is.
2.The one who refuse to accept the sorry.
No one can save these kind of relationship from being broken!
Things aren't as smooth as they appear! They are tangled in every possible aspect!
We need to see deeply into the underlying factors of human emotions rather than superficially
seeing the expressions.
Here comes the 3As of a strong relationship:-
"We should be ready to accept our mistakes"
"We should adjust ourselves, without complaining about the other"
"We should apologize the other person's mistake when he/she realizes it and comes forward with a Sorry"
There is this one quote which I personally follow,
"If it is important to you, you will find a way; if it isn't, you will find an excuse!"
"It is in our hands to make a bond or to break a bond!"
Be wise and be nice!